An arithmetic illustration Ioannidis derives from published meta-analyzed cohort estimates (external data, none of his own): the conditional ‘if these hazard ratios are lifelong causal, then…’ is uncontested arithmetic; the egg figure (−6 years/day) is directly on the main question. The implied magnitudes are individually implausible and cannot all hold jointly (one cannot simultaneously gain 12 y from hazelnuts, 12 y from coffee, and 5 y from a mandarin against an 80-year baseline).